Kitties in December!

Oh my goodness! What a wonderful surprise! I woke up on Friday morning with so much hope I could taste it. I love order. LOOOOOVE order. I knew it would be a day to catch up on laundry, clean the floors and hopefully tackle a couple neglected areas. And maybe, just maybe, we would have time to decorate the house with fresh evergreens and homemade snowflakes. We were off to a great start and feeling very optimistic by 10:00am. when I sent two of my children out to tend to the animals...

They promptly came running back into the house with looks of shock, excitement and concern all muddled together. "Mom, we think we heard kitties in the barn! We think something is trying to get them because we heard scratching and meowing!"

 

We all hurried to grab our boots and coats and raced out on our rescue mission. As soon as I entered the barn I could hear the most precious cries for help coming from kittens we had known nothing about. We followed them to my husband's metal recycling barrel and there they were. The scratching the kids had heard was not a ferocious animal, but it was coming from the kittens who were doing their best to keep from sliding any further down into the barrel. Two cuddly baby kittens were overjoyed to be rescued and reunited with their momma.

 

It took us awhile to get them all situated with momma cat. We made a cozy place for them to be safe from our dog, Max.  Just as we finished, we heard more cries for help! Another sweet kitty was stumbling around the hay loft when it slipped down and was clinging to a board so as not to fall all the way to the ground. Thankfully, a bucket was just high enough to step on so I could rescue our third kitty.





Three sweet kitties! We were ecstatic! And just as we had her situated, wouldn't you know, we heard one more cry from the hay loft! I had to find a ladder and pray this one wouldn't stumble over the edge! After what seemed like forever, momma cat got behind the kitty and somehow managed to encourage the last little kitten to come forward enough for me to reach out and grab him.

 

By now it was noon and our morning of productivity took a back seat to the blissful joys of new kitties! It was time to eat and I knew everyone needed some food in order to hopefully prevent any melt downs. We all ate quickly and spoke excitedly of our new kittens.

After lunch my youngest daughter ran out to check on them again. To her shock there were only two kitties left! We searched and searched and searched (forgetting all about my grand plans of conquering the house that day.) Finally, after finding fur near the kitty's new home I told the kids that something must have come and got them. We were all heart broken. We had worked so hard to save the kitties and protect them and now just an hour, later two were gone.

 

I tried to get through the rest of the day and we managed to get some school work done, but we all felt pretty bad about the whole situation. My husband came home around 5:30 that night and the kids all rushed out to greet him and fill him in on all the happenings of the day. They all decided to go out to the barn to check on the two kitties we still had and see if they could find any other clues of the other kitties' disappearance. About ten minutes later some VERY excited children came running up the steps, beaming from ear to ear! The other two kitties had been found and rescued!

 

What a day! I cannot imagine what it is like to live on a true farm! I feel like there is enough drama here and we only have chickens, a dog, two cats and now four very sweet kittens!

 

The house never did get "tackled," or decorated. But I have a feeling it will be a day the kids won't soon forget!

 

Each Child Is Unique

A follow up from the last post....

     For I say, through the grace given to me, to everyone who is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think soberly, as God has dealt to each one a measure of faith. For as we have many members in one body, but all the members do not have the same function, so we, being many, are one body in Christ, and individually members of one another. Having then gifts differing according to the grace that is given us, let us use them...."

Romans 12:5-6



I love it when scripture points out truths so eloquently, in ways I could never express on my own. This passage is  speaking of the spiritual gifts we have been given to be used for God's glory. Just as we are given different spiritual gifts, we are also created uniquely in other areas. God designed His church to be brilliantly different and when we gather as a body these differences were given to strengthen, support, and give depth to this living organism we call church.

After giving my daughter her pep talk during a spelling lesson a couple weeks ago, I have had many thoughts about the goals I have for my children individually. By nature I am always re-evaluating what I am doing, how I am doing it, if it is effective, if is worth the energy, etc. When I told my daughter I didn't care how she was doing in spelling, it was a true statement, but it was a very new idea that has not always resonated within my being. It has certainly caused me to question my parenting and teaching to see if I really am OK with my children's differences.

Children are unique. I know this. It is obvious. I see it demonstrated in families, in classrooms, in church gatherings, and at the park. I encourage my children to discover their unique gifting so that they can develop their strengths and use them for Christ (Just as it is stated in the scripture verses above)...And then something bewildering happens. I parent and often educate as if they are all the same. I expect them to learn the same things, at the same rate, using the same style to connect with all these profoundly unique children. For example, I have gotten frustrated when one child just isn't catching on to something that another child breezed through. If I really am OK with their differences, wouldn't it make sense that I would really be OK with each child excelling, or struggling in different ways and at different speeds. My humbling realization came when I saw that I was completely OK with the differences as long as that meant my child was ahead of "normal" in a given area. But what if they were behind?....When I was truly honest with myself I began to realize that when my children showed signs they were lagging behind a bit in an area, all sorts of unwanted emotions were thrust upon me... "I must not being doing something right... What will people think of my teaching ability? What will people think of my child and our family...?" My heart sank. It is never fun to see past the outer facade of your own heart and be welcomed with the self centered reality of insecurity... especially when it involves your children.

If I really believe that God gave us gifts and weaknesses then why am I so insecure? I believe that it is because I know it to be true in my head, but along with those thoughts are the desire to fit in, to be "normal." Who wants to be different? But one man's wise words shifted my thoughts and have continued to make me ponder the values I am afraid to admit to hold (valueing other's opinions above God's) Voddie Baucham quoted the scripture that says, " You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden..." Matthew 5:14 He then added, "Do you know what is interesting about a city on a hill? They are separate and distinct and therefore visible." I realize that this verse is talking about our calling to be set apart for Christ but I think that it ties in beautifully to the contradiction in my head.

If I really believed that we are created uniquely, I could truly see the beauty in those differences. I feel like I would see these differences with a grace and security that could only come by resting in Christs sovereign design for my family's lives.

My thoughts are shifting and I am now asking a different set of what if's?... What if my child is not excelling at the rate she should be, compared to normal standards, even if I was doing everything right? Again, what if she was never designed to be"normal" in the areas that would be socially convenient to be normal in. What if she was never intended to advance until later in her childhood and she is just soaking it all in to later bloom into brilliance. What if God blessed her with the gift of being "below average" so that she would have to lean into Him in ways "gifted" children never will. She will press into Him in all ways in all things for she knows she can do nothing without Him. It is time for this mama's heart to reconsider what the well educated child looks like. If that child is more artistically bent, relationally bent, scientifically, medically, etc. I hope that as a teacher and mother, I can give each child the freedom to learn in an atmosphere that they can truly thrive in... and be truly OK with that.

It is time to let go of so many of the pressures I place on my children that are rooted in the fear of what others might think of them and myself. It is time to really embrace all that my children are and all that they will become... Knowing that there will come, along with their beautiful strengths, weaknesses... that are perfectly normal and OK. Of course, I will help them in those weaknesses, but it is my hope that I will no longer be insecure in them.

We have been created uniquely and are called to walk a different road. Only when I am secure in this calling can I truly embrace my children in all of their beautiful individuality. I am ashamed to admit that I have lived far too long judging what is best for my children by first looking around to see what is normal... or what would be exceptional in the eyes of those around me. In John  8:32 it says that, "the truth will set us free..." That is my prayer. To truly be free of what others might think is normal, exeptational, or behind. Free...

Embracing the way they learn,

                         the speed in which they learn and

                                      the subjects they are excited to learn about.

 

Embracing the weaknesses and the strengths,

                        the struggle and ease,

                                      the calling no matter how prominent or meek.

 
    Knowing all the while that my loving God has made no mistake with my children. They are precious and unique to Him. They will will be precious and unique to me.

Who Cares

We had our first melt down of the year during our spelling lesson three days ago.( Just to clarify, it was not the first melt down of the year, but the first one during a spelling lesson.) Normally my children are beaming and stay cheerfully occupied the entire lesson and beyond. I know that sounds strange with a subject like spelling, but we use a fun program and I try to change it up enough to keep it engaging. So I was completely caught off guard when my nine year old daughter dug in her heals after reviewing the first two words! Oh boy....I really didn't have the energy for a pep talk. I was desperately trying to remind myself of the words I have said over and over again to other moms. "It is ALL education. The conflict. The spelling lesson. The communication learned through it all." So I stopped. I really didn't want to take the time, but I did.

"Oh Lord, give me the patience. Please draw her out of this emotional mess," I prayed. Then I asked why she was so upset? How could two misspelled words put her into such a funk? She mumbled something about her six year old sister doing better than her and that she must be behind in spelling. So I told her what any loving parent would tell their child. I told her that there are MANY kids that are better than her...and I let it sink for effect. Just as the whole world was about to crash down on her I told her that there were MANY people that were better than me at spelling. Her eyes bugged out in disbelief! Yes I know it is hard to believe, but it is true. And I added, there are MANY people who are better at fixing their cars than me and many who are better cooks then me...WHO CARES?  Who cares if someone can program computers better than me? Who cares if I am able to garden better than someone who is better with balancing a budget? Who cares?

I told my sweet daughter that I really didn't care how good she was at spelling. All I wanted was her best. She is not supposed to be good in all subjects. I do not expect her to be good at everything. God made us that way so we would all excel in different ways, in different things. She will naturally excel in the areas she is gifted in and will have to work harder on the rest. But, as long as she is challenged and doing her best, I DON'T CARE about the level she is in.

She was now smiling and ready to continue the lesson. The pressure of perfection was lifted and she was free. Free to try, to make mistakes, and learn without the weight she had carried before. Before we continued with the lesson she smiled and said, "You should write a blog about this and title it, 'Who Cares.'" So I did.

*The content for this blog was read and approved by my daughter. Her permission is given to share this information with anyone who will be encouraged by it.

A Little Inspiration

This year has been such a different year for us as it relates to home education. I truly feel free. I am inspired. I have purpose and confidence. It is not that I didn't have any of these things last year... or the years prior, but this year they have become part of me. Last year I wanted to be free, I wanted to stand confidently... this year these things have settled in me in such a way that my mind is not so easily swayed by unnecessary pressures I had placed on myself... and worse, my children. I truly see things differently. I see them with conviction. The old ways have little pull on me because they are completely undesirable. I can now clearly see the cracks, the flaws in them and see that there are so many other ways of educating with better life giving results! Some days I am so excited about this new way of home educating I just want to sing... and I do!

My new hope is to set aside the idea of feeding my children full of facts and figures. I pray that God gives me new and clever ways to cultivate curiosity. I am asking God to show me which questions to ask that will trigger a passion to discover, solve, rethink and ponder. I really don't know exactly how this will play out but, I do believe that the hunger to learn has the potential to become insatiable. When this passion is directed for God's glory, I believe any of my children can shine, excel, and lead in ways I never imagined my children being capable of.

Just this week I came across a website containing many talks supporting educational methods rooted in curiosity, discovery, and the amazing abilities of children.  At www.ted.com you will find educators who are passionate about learning, math, science etc. and are seeking to inspire fellow teachers, parents, and educators to break away from traditional ways of doing things. Below are a couple worthwhile talks to inspire you in your home school journey. (as a disclaimer, I will say that there are talks on this website that I do not agree with, please use discretion.)

Sugata Mitra has launched a revolutionary way of learning that I think is worth watching.  His testing grounds for his revolutionary teaching styles are based in the slums of India and other poor countries. His results are fascinating!

http://www.ted.com/talks/sugata_mitra_the_child_driven_education?language=en

Sir Ken Robinson gives an inspiring look at seeing each child individually and helping them develop their unique giftings.

http://www.ted.com/talks/ken_robinson_says_schools_kill_creativity?language=en

Dan Meyer opened my eyes to see how many curriculum materials actually rob the child of discovery and intrigue. They present math problems neatly and with all the  variables available, and in doing so, deprive the children the need to think, struggle or ask questions. It really helped me rethink what I am asking my children to do in more areas than math.

http://www.ted.com/talks/dan_meyer_math_curriculum_makeover?language=en

Just Another Day In Paradise

Today was truly, "just another day in paradise."  No, we were not in Maui, the Bahamas, or Paris. We were home. Home...  Each child slept as much as they needed to be well rested and ready for the day. For our 5 year old son, his wake up time was early enough for him to get to go to work with Daddy. While he and Daddy snuck quietly out the door to operate an excavator and load branches into the dump trailer...a five year old's dream come true, the rest of us got ourselves ready for the day and started our morning chores. It wasn't long before Daddy and our son were driving in with a full trailer and hungry tummies. I served them waffles and eggs while the girls did their math and I tried to keep things moving. Daddy had to go back to work soon and this time he couldn't take any help with him.

The girls and I were moving on to grammar lessons, when my five year old asked if he could go outside. "Of course!", was my reply! The girls and I reviewed grammar, as he raced outside with a baggie in hand. He had a mission. He was determined to find the best and most precious rocks in the whole driveway!

(My sweet, sweet view from my kitchen sink window.)

 

 For over an hour he knelt, studying intently each rock, and only selecting those which he knew were extravagantly AWESOME! When he came in soaked to the bone, he was beaming with satisfaction at his sandwich baggie full of treasure. (And some would say boys can't sit still! I wonder if the people who say that have ever introduced the boys they are speaking of, to rocks, water, and a quiet rainy day. I guess to be fair I would have to admit that our little guy wasn't sitting completely still. He was creeping up and down the driveway at a snails pace actively looking for the one.)

 

Because we didn't have to go anywhere, he came in and had time to take a long hot bath to warm up and just play with his bath toys. At some point in the day, he did pick up a white board and practiced his numbers 1-20. He did paint for awhile, and he did use dinosaur stamps to create his own dinosaur land. And that was his day. A beautiful, rainy, cozy, creative, inspiring day.

It wasn't long ago that I would have felt guilty for not doing enough with him educationally.  I have seen what kindergartners are required to do during a school day, and it wasn't long ago, that I tried to meet all of the schools standards, and even go beyond it if I could, to really give him the best education possible.

Today, I see things a little differently. This morning's ride in the Ford truck was not just idle time spent traveling to the jobsite. Our son was privilidged with the opportunity to soak in what it is to be a man... just him and his dad. He observed what is involved in part of Daddy's day. Once at the jobsite, he experienced the rush of moving little levers and seeing BIG results, as they operated the excavator together. In days past, it was normal for small boys to observe their dads as they provided for their families, and in doing so, caught a glimpse of something to work towards. Sadly, we live in a day and age, where this is no longer the case. Though my son does not get to observe his daddy working on a daily basis, on days like today, he gets a small taste of what his dad does when he leaves the house everyday.

Who knows what went through his mind in the truck, on the excavator, or out in the rain today. But I know that when a mind is free to just be, later it has a greater capacity to absorb. And when it absorbs, and has time again to just be, those precious thoughts go deep. I now sit in amazement at the freedom he has to discover, explore, create, and investigate. Who knows what will come of his hours today. But I do know his mind is bright, clear, and thrilled to be soaking in all that he can. He has a rich education. For him, I am pretty sure, it was close to a day in paradise.

These are a Few of My Favorite Things

I have found that there are certain things along the home school journey that make me want to jump for joy for months after discovering them. Here are a couple of them:

Dry Erase Boards for Spelling and Grammar Practice

Oh my goodness! I love All About Spelling! My only regret is that we didn't find it earlier so my oldest could have started out with it in kindergarten. The kids get to use colored tiles to spell words, label them, and then use colorful dry erase markers to practice. They love it!

 

 

The board also works wonderfully for grammar. Sometimes I write a sentence or paragraph with many mistakes and they have to correct it. Once it is corrected they will underline the verbs with green, the nouns with blue,  circle the subject in magenta, and so on. They would do this every day if they could!

 

 

Brightly Colored Folders and Notebooks

 

I know, I know this idea sounds like it wouldn't be blog worthy but let me explain. For years we have had piles of assignments and worksheets that I would, upon completion, sneak away and try to dispose of before anyone found out I was throwing away their precious work. If I was caught there would be tears and drama. 

 

This year I bought folders for 30 cents a piece and notebooks for almost as cheap. The folders I purchased were the ones with the three prongs that you can insert notebook paper into.  I also bought a three-hole-punch to punch copies, cardstock, and construction paper to fit into the folder. The kids had a blast decorating them using either permanent marker or construction paper and stickers. They LOVE their folders and can't wait to open them up. All their precious work is contained in them and is easily found because they chose a different color for each subject.  

 

 

I will add that My oldest daughter uses a glue stick to glue in her multiplication charts right into her notebook. I have found that every lesson she is asked to either glue something or highlight definitions with pretty colors, she flies through! Her attitude is so positive that I have been trying to make it a point to do something like that every day. She is so excited she can't wait to show her daddy at night! I realize every kid learns differently, this year I am realizing how much a difference a little color and glue can make in a child's math experience!

 

 

These are some handwriting, and grammar folders. I realize the top one doesn't look all that exciting. There is one giant sticker that my daughter was allowed to place on the folder and that was enough for her to love it. Every cursive letter she has practiced last year and this year is in there. This year we will add verses, quotes and poems she is working on memorizing. At the end of the year we can look back on her progress and see how far she has come.

 

I am especially excited about the kids' science notebooking journals! We are doing Apologia Science this year and we are loving it!  I am going through it together with my nine year old, six year old  and five year old. Because they each have their own journal I can tweak it just enough for each child to make it age appropriate for them individually. We have recorded science experiments, drawn sketches, and have made scrapbook like pages about our trip to the zoo and other fun experiences. We have also written thoughts on those moments and tucked them along side of it all. All for the cost of a 30 cent folder and the paper to go inside. I love it! 

 

Chickies in October!

What an exciting day we had last Tuesday! We ate our breakfast, gave goodbye kisses to Daddy, and started in on our chores. As the house was bustling with activity, I remembered that the kids had been telling me about a "broody" chicken and I had been putting off checking it out. Partly because life has been busy and partly because we have had so-------- many false alarms and "issues" with broody chickens, I just never got out to the coop to see if it was true or not. So as my middle two children were about to go tend to the chickens that morning I told them to listen to see if they could hear any peeping noises coming from our hen. With a gleam in their eyes and a spring in their step they took off toward the coop. A couple minutes later they trampled in, eyes big as saucers! Sure enough, we had chicks!

The morning was spent cleaning up the feed trough we use for raising the chicks and preparing all the other needed supplies. It is times like these that my heart almost explodes with joy. For one, baby chicks are just plain adorable and could put almost anyone in a cheerful mood. Secondly, there is just something amazing that happens when all of us are working on a project everyone is thrilled about. I will say, that we still had to work out issues of water accidentally being sprayed in someones face while rinsing out the trough. We still had to solve the problem of who would get to scrub and who would get to rinse. We still had to coordinate four pairs of feet around the trough as we clumsily carried it from the back of the barn to the front. BUT it was SO worth it! The smiles on their faces and the look of satisfaction in their eyes spoke to my heart and told me that all the commotion was worth it indeed!


What the kids learned about broody chickens through this experience:

• Chickens are not broody when they spend half the day OFF their eggs. (This was a big one for our children to understand! We went through many eggs that were not successfully hatched before my husband and I realized that we needed to really explain the signs of a broody chicken and how to tell if she isn't.)
• If you have a broody chicken, you cannot keep adding eggs to her nest and expect them all to hatch....There is just no physically possible way for her to keep all 24 eggs warm!
• If you have a broody chicken and leave her alone with her original eggs.... she will incubate them for you and they will hatch!!! Amazing!

Where do I begin? (part 2)

    I wanted to share  a list of many of our goals that we are seeking to accomplish as we educate and disciple our little ones. Some of these will be touched on when they are older but it will give an idea of what God has placed on our hearts so far. Other families will have lists that will look different to this, no doubt. I believe that it is natural, normal and healthy to be different in many of these areas. God has placed your children in your family, not mine. So, though the main focus of pointing our children to Christ will be the same, your other goals may look very different.

Our Family Discipleship and Education Goals:

• To love the Lord with all their heart, soul, mind and strength.
• To love their neighbor (others) as themselves.
• That my kids would have the fruit of the Spirit in their lives. Galatians 5:22-23 
• (love, joy, peace, long suffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control.)
• To have a love for scripture and see it as a relevant source for wisdom in all areas of life.
• That they would love to serve others.
• That they would have a healthy self awareness.
• That they would be comfortable in their skin, having confidence.
• That they would love to learn. 
• A love to work and feel satisfaction in it.
• A love of nature.
• Have a desire to become a godly man or woman, spouse, and parent.
• Learn to communicate honestly, directly, and respectfully.
• Learn healthy ways to resolve conflict.
• Learn home skills. (meal planning, cleaning techniques, organizational skills etc.)(boys    included)
• Have basic carpentry and mechanical skills. (girls included) 
• Understand the basics of politics and how God sees it relating to their lives.
• Money management skills.
• Basic knowledge of gardening, harvesting, preserving.
• An entrepreneurial spirit.
• Understand nutrition in depth.  
• Have computer skills.
• Be comfortable working with numbers and math skills as they relate to life.
• Use grammar skills to express themselves.

    When I go through this list I begin to see value in so much more than multiplication and nouns. I begin to place value in learning to wash dishes, chopping apples, and setting the table beautifully. Disputes among siblings are no longer inconveniences but are training grounds for conflict resolution in all areas of life. Time spent outside just basking in God's goodness becomes a lesson in thankfulness and appreciation for His creation.  I go from feeling inadequate to wondering how I could ever accomplish these desires for my children after school hours and between sports activities. It will take focused attention to train our children in these ways but I believe that it is possible. As my husband and I grow in all these areas, we are able to impart them to our children in natural and applicable ways as opportunity arises.

      It is absolutely beautiful to see our children starting to get it. It is a gift to be sure. And when they don't ... which is normal...it gives me even more motivation to press into God and seek out His guidance for our lives.

Where Do I Begin? (part 1)

Just the thought of home education can fill a mother with fear and trepidation. Her mind can quickly buckle under the rapid fire of accusatory thoughts and concerns. What if I wreck my child? What if he/ she falls behind? What if we butt heads. How will I find the best curriculum?...along with... I don't even have a college degree! I don't have patience! We can't possibly afford all the things we will need, so that my children don't miss out on the things they could have in school! No, public school is much safer... More convenient... And I will be a better mom because I will be well rested when they come off the school bus at the end of their day...

There are other times that after beginning with great intentions a mother can find herself alone, discouraged, and overwhelmed. She started with all sorts of ambition and enthusiasm. Slowly but steadily she finds herself struggling to find the strength to teach one more math lesson or one more writing assignment.  The kids may not be responding to her teaching in ways she thought they would. It might take more energy than she had origionally planned for. Whatever the case, she is tired and possibly sees that the grass is greener in the public school system.

I have often wondered if there was a way to overcome some of these thoughts. I too have struggled with doubt and discouragement. But I have also seen a theme in these times of wavering. The cycle starts out with excitement and things go well for awhile. Then we hit a road block and one of the kiddos isn't understanding certain concepts, or life gets busy and this mama has more on her plate than she can handle. School starts to slide. I start questioning everything I am doing, and how I am doing it.  I begin to entertain thoughts of defeat and despair.... I find myself worried that my kids will never measure up..."Measure up to what?" Is the question I am now starting to ask.

It wasn't until just recently that my eyes have been opened to just how steeped I am in the mindset of public education, and how I was still measuring my family's successes by it. I thought I was free from the pressures that school places on children.  I thought I was truly free to go at our own pace. I thought that I loved creating my own schedule and teaching at my child's own speed...and I do to an extent. But, I am convinced that I am also threatened by such freedom.  When life gets hard, the mental attack begins. My mind is the battleground, and I am at war within myself. The truth is, all this freedom is scary without vision. The responsibility of my children's success is absolutely frightening. So, though I am committed to home education, I have repeatedly turned to the government to tell me if my child is truly a success or not. And if I don't meet their requirements, in their timetable, I feel like a failure.

I am convinced that my measure of success has been rooted for far to long in what the world tells me has value. Sure, I would tell you that I live my life for the Lord, not for the world...but... what do I pattern my child's education after? I have picked up curriculum and decided that we would go through the book, first, because it is what is "required" and second, because it has the grade level my child should be in written on it. What if they are further behind or ahead? If they are "behind" I pile guilt on myself. If they are ahead I have felt a sense of pride that I know is ungodly. Instead, what if I chose a math book based on where my child was at. What if I was completely comfortable with where they were, as long as they were being challenged, and understood the concepts being taught?

Why has it taken me soooo long to get this? I believe it is because at my core, I am insecure. I am uncertain that I could actually know my child, and that I could ask God for His values and direction. It would actually take seeking the Lord, and trusting that He could show me what is best for my child. I would actually have to be confident in what we were doing with our children, though other people might not share our opinions. For too long I just didn't have that kind of certainty running through my veins. It is my hope that this year is different. I hope that this year I can be comfortable with where my children are at and only focus on what the Lord has placed on my heart in educating and discipling my children.

It reminds me a lot of the time in history when the Israelites were fleeing the Egyptians, only to get to the desert and ask to go back. Why in the world would they want to return? The truth is there is a strange security that comes from being told what to do, how to think, and how to respond. They too fell into that trap. The Israelites knew what to expect if they went back to Egypt...slavery. But they wanted back in...Why?...Security. Desert life would mean a life of blind faith. It would mean trusting in a God that never laid out the full plan. My life is no desert experience, but I do feel like I am walking in uncharted territory, and it does require a lot of looking up to Jesus to find my bearings. And when I do I am compelled to copy very little of what many schools are teaching.

My oldest child is nine years old, and we have been home educating since preschool. Sadly, this is the first year I have sat down to make a list of goals that I would like my children to accomplish in their time before they "graduate."  Because of this I feel that I have often lost perspective in the journey of home education. But, when I look at the goals now set for these little lives I have purpose, I become grounded, I have clarity. Therefore, I am done measuring their success by a system that is not God honoring and does not even apologize for it.

If there is a mom out there considering home education, or has just begun, I would strongly encourage you to stop everything, and spend some time with Jesus. Ask Him for His goals for YOUR children (not some other family's). Ask Him what it would look like to raise your child well, and how you would know if your child is a success.  What skills are important to Him. Ask Him to place people in your path that can encourage you in these things. And then, when life gets hard, and it will, go back to HIM. Go back and ask Him how you are doing. Go through the list you have set, and see how you can accomplish these things in HIS strength and wisdom. Your children may not resemble mainstream America, but I have a feeling your Father in heaven won't be too upset about it. If your eyes are only fixed on Him and His ways, you won't be either.

I am not saying that math, science, reading, and writing are unimportant. I have a feeling you might end up inspiring your children to higher levels than you would have, if you hadn't sought out His standards. They are still only part of the goals God is asking you to build into your child. They are not the focus.

It is my hope and prayer that this could save you from the stress I have had to wrestle with. Home education can still be challenging but, with clear goals, and His standards, it can go from struggle to joy and from frustration, to excitement. It is all about perspective.

Not Just a Trip to The Zoo

Finally, after much anticipation, we were able to go to the Woodland Park Zoo! All summer long our kids have been looking forward to the possibility of going and last weekend it became a reality. Each year we ask the kids to decide together what special outing they would like to work towards. Last year we all agreed to work together to earn enough money to go to the county fair. This year our goal was the zoo. So, they have been growing veggies, harvesting, and selling them to earn enough money to go. It is not that I believe in slave labor or that we can't afford to go. We can afford to do fun things, we just have to choose what those fun things are carefully because the cost does add up. We have spoken to our children about this and told them that if we want to do extra fun things, we will have to work together as a family in order to afford them.

One of our goals as parents is that we would teach our children the value of work and the satisfaction of getting to enjoy the fruit of ones labor. As the kids pulled weeds, watered, scrubbed veggies, etc. I was able to talk to them about how much work it takes for one day of fun at the zoo. When they wanted to do other fun things that cost a lot of money or buy that new lego set, I was able to ask them if it was worth it? I reminded them of how many hours they have worked to make the amount of money they earned. I told them that we can change our plans and go buy that new toy, but that they would have to wait till next year to afford the zoo.

I really didn't know what to expect when we started this process but now that we have done it for two years, I absolutely love it. I am no longer the one always saying no to fun things. They are the ones that must choose. They are learning that things in life will not just be handed to them. They are learning the joys of working with their hands and how fun it is to work together as a family.  

So, the day finally came and my husband and I had the priviledge of driving our four sweet kiddos down to Seattle. Oh the excitement that filled our vehicle! We arrived at the entrance and it was such a delight to see their faces light up as we gave the lady our tickets and set out on our day of fun!  

 

Was it worth a summer of hard work? You bet!!! And I look forward to what they will decide to work toward next year!  

The Cost

I am tired. This heart of mine carries a heavy load. It is a load that we have deliberately chosen to carry with purpose and vision, but it is none the less tiring and overwhelming at times. It is the weight of parenting four beautiful children and seeking to point them to Christ in all we say and do. Every day it takes all that I am, every last drop of energy to invest in these little lives and the lives we interact with as we go about our day. And in the exhaustion there are days that I cry out, "I am so tired! No one understands, Lord! No one sees." It is true. Because we live a simple life and spend a lot of time at home, no one does see. No one does fully understand. And just when I am about to sink deeper into the pit I have dug with my own hands, because of the choices we have purposely made, He comes. No, I cannot see Him, but He is there. I am reminded and assured...He sees. I am comforted and consoled...He cares. I am met with the ability to keep going, to keep pressing on with new found vision and strength...in Him. He directs me and enables me to realize that there is little in life that has great value that does not also come with a great cost.

There are many costs to this life we have chosen. There is the financial cost that is felt as I do not bring in a paycheck. There is a cost of certain freedoms as I do not have the luxury of dropping my little ones off at school and strolling through the grocery store with a mind clear and focused only on my shopping list.  But, the convicting reality is that these "costs" are simply selfish and are centered around my wants and desires.  I would like to see myself as having more character than what is actually there. I would like to say that I am so consumed with following my Lord and God as I parent these precious lives that I do not struggle with all of this... but I do.

I struggle when I feel like I have invested every last drop of energy I have into the character development of a child, only to see that the behavior he or she is demonstrating at a given moment is nothing like the choices I have been trying to instill in them. I struggle when I feel like I have given my all in parenting, only to have someone critique it. I struggle when I am so tired and it takes all that I have to maintain a a positive attitude in Costco with my four children "helping" me and turn to see another mother, child free and looking beautifully made up and well rested. I struggle when I have tried all day to get the house in order only to look around and see that it is all worse off than when we woke up! My flesh looks around and sees all that everyone else is doing and I slip into selfpity, doubt, and isolation.

This is my fight. I battle it daily. I must choose to take every thought captive and bring them to Jesus. It is only then that I find peace from the pressures I place on myself. It is only after He has renewed my mind that I have clarity once again to keep pressing on. I come back to scripture and my struggles are put into perspective as I am reminded of the cost that Jesus faced on this earth.

"Therefore we also, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin that so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.

For consider Him who endured such hostility from sinners against Himself, lest you become weary and discouraged in your souls." Hebrews 12:1-3 

There is a joy set before me. I am met with a choice. What will be my focus today? Will I choose to run the race set before me with delight, even though it may challenge my very core? Or, will I look around and be ensnared with the things that seem so important on the outside but have no eternal value in the end.

When I get my eyes off of the work, the mess, the unexpected changes in our day, I see these beautiful little faces full of life and wonder. I see potential. I see the possibilities of what God can do through these lives to further His kingdom for His glory. It is amazing how all these thoughts can capture my heart in a moment. My circumstances may not change... they might even worsen. But when I fix my eyes on Jesus and His ways I can suddenly breath. I have strength and courage to finish the day. The "cost" that I have been overwhelmed by diminishes and I am once again humbled by the smallness of my faith. I am so thankful for His overwhelming grace as I seek to follow His ways.

 

Our Foundation for Home Education

    How many times have I been asked the question, "So why do you homeschool?" The person asking this question has no idea what flashes through my brain. It is so simple, so direct, so hard to put into words the very foundation of our education. The person asking this question is not ready or even looking for a ten page essay explaining the depth of my passion and calling to home educate. They are not anticipating a five hour conversation revolving around the long and sometimes lonely journey God has brought us on. So I begin by saying, "I have a completely different mindset than what is being taught in schools, Christian or public." That answer might be sufficient for them, or it might lead into a discussion spanning many days, emails, phone calls and book recommendations.

    My mindset stems from a passage of Scripture that has given me a growing passion to home educate, and disciple my children.

"And these words which I command you today shall be in your heart. You shall teach them to your children, and talk to them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up."  Deutoronomy 6:6-7

I had read this section of scripture many times over the years and always felt that it was a call to raise your children in the ways of the Lord.  It wasn't until  a couple of years ago that it really grabbed hold of my heart and wouldn't let go. I was really struggling with being overwhelmed with four small children and feeing like, despite my greatest intentions, I wasn't being the mother I wanted to be. I started looking around me and seeing all the amazing things that all the other moms were doing with their children and I just didn't measure up....Measure up to what? What were my goals, my hopes; what was my foundation for all that I was trying to accomplish in raising my children?

    I took a Sunday afternoon to sit down with my Bible in hand and seek out what God had to say. That day I came across this passage from Deuteronomy. And with new clarity found that I had lumped all these instructions into a simple "Raise them for God's glory" thought and didn't see the "how" part in the same passage. How do we raise them for God's glory? When you sit, walk, lie down, and rise up. ALL the time! We are to be with our children ALL the time with the purpose of teaching and instructing them in the ways of the Lord. God knows that the hearts of children are not set overnight. It takes years to form opinions, beliefs,...the foundation for the rest of their life. And once this foundation is set, it is very difficult to alter later. Why would I give these years to someone else when God tells us that they are the responsibility of the parents.

   As I catch the heart of this passage it tells me that I am to be spending my days in purposeful, engaging, inspiring activities and conversation that point to Christ. As I live daily with my children I will pass on to them a gift that far out weighs what the world has to offer. It cannot be measured in monetary value. It will be at their very core. A foundation to carry them through lifes valleys and plateaus. They will know the God we serve because they have walked with us daily seeking Him in all things. They have seen us turn to Him when things are hard and praise Him when we experience the joy of answered prayers. It will take time, energy, sacrifice, humility, compassion. It will take diligence, purpose, encouragement, patience...much patience. But the reward,...oh the reward will be something I cannot express. To see the miracle of a child seeking to please the Lord in all they say and do. Is there a greater joy?

    This is my passion. It gives me purpose in all that I do. Transforming the daily activities of life into a high and holy calling. It is what drives me to get out of bed and find greatness in washing dishes, folding laundry, teaching subtraction, and times tables. Because it is through these daily activities I point my children to their Savior. They are watching my responses, my priorities, and my attitude. They are listening to my tone and my language. So humbling, so overwhelming without Christ. But with Him as my source of inspiration, and as I draw on Him for wisdom and strength, I can soar. There is hope for discipling these little ones for His glory. It will not be perfect, but it is possible. This is my motivation for every area of parenting, part of which is education.